Wisdom from women in their 60's

I keep coming back to a Huffington Post article I read recently, that contained 60 pieces of advice that women in their 60's would give to women in their 30's.  I noticed it was actually a road map to grace and self-love.  It just wasn't organized that way.  So here's what I got from this list:

The overarching theme is to be yourself.  To  truly honor what IS you, and separate it from what isn't you (EX: your appearance, the date on your birth certificate).  These kernels of wisdom speak directly to being who you are in this moment and not worrying about what others think:

• Be yourself, age with grace
• Always be true to yourself... it's a long learning process but it pays off
• Forget about society's stereotypes about aging
• Don't worry about getting older, worry about being boring
• Age is only a number -- it does not define who you are
• Be yourself -- shine your light.  Be present, the real you, aware and alive in every moment

When I realized that "be yourself" was really the message, I wondered how we were supposed to do that.  I mean, it sounds great, but we've spent much of our lives being conditioned to take care of others, so how EXACTLY am I supposed to live my life in the present moment AS ME?  Turns out, the answers were right there mixed in with "be yourself".  It was a big list, but comes down to this:

• Living in this moment supports feelings of happiness.  When we spend all of our time reliving unhappy past moments, holding on to the stories of the past, and trying to avoid the situation happening again, we are not in the present.  We are either lamenting the past or worrying about the future.  That doesn't mean we don't need to acknowledge the past, or should let people in our lives off of bad behavior, but if we are constantly in a state of depression or angst, we cannot enjoy the good things in the present.
• Attitude matters.  Look for the magic, enjoy the good things about the here and now, be inspired, notice the beauty.  
• Follow your intuition.  Trust your instincts.  And give them time to speak to you when you are in quiet and stillness.  When we are too busy we often don't hear those voices.  If it doesn't feel right, don't do it.
• Cultivate a relationship with yourself of the kind that you want with everyone.  Learn to laugh more, have more empathy (for others and for yourself), embrace imperfection, never speak badly about yourself, and forgive easily.  
• As for lifestyle, only spend money on things that are near and dear to your heart (the rest is just junk).  Let things be simple, save for the future (not out of fear, but out of supporting your future self), and treasure what you do have.

And then I'll be totally honest with you... I've avoided this post for a good month or more because I hate lists of "easy ways to be happy" that sound all jolly... like "release your anger", "notice the magic"... because it just ISN'T that easy.  If it were we'd all be dancing around throwing confetti.  

But, these things, while they seem overly simplified (They are!  They leave out so much!) are actually still true.  They are the one sentence bottom line to: 

• Forgive easily.  But not too easily.  Don't let people off the hook for bad behavior.  Hold to your boundaries.  And then, don't hold their actions against them.  Let it go.  Stand for yourself, take care of you, and then kick them out of your world.  It's not ok for people to treat you badly.  But don't hold a grudge.
• Release your anger is another one that gets me.  The response to injustice is anger.  If I were to pretend I wasn't angry in the spirit of releasing anger, then I'm just stuffing my truth away and not standing for what I believe in.  I have a VERY strong sense of justice and fairness, so I used to feel angry a lot.  Since anger is one of those emotions that is frowned upon in society ("just calm DOWN!", "chill out", "I can't deal with your anger" - all great comebacks from people who don't listen to the issue, and then blame the angry person for the problem), it tends to get suppressed.  We aren't taught how to stop focussing on the person is receiving our anger in a way that empowers us to create a more just society (more on that later).  

What I'm saying is... that the list sounds simple, and I know it's not.  What I'm asking you to do is to DIVE IN!  When you feel that resistance to the simplified statement... ask yourself what is there for you do, what action needs to be taken, what needs to be acknowledged, in order for you to let that statement be simple?  Since anger is one of mine, I'll be posting more on that soon.